Mourning fries to help with loss of loved one

A few months ago, a dear friend of mine passed away. The heartbreak is still very real. This was the first person I lost whom I loved deeply outside of my blood family. He was my chosen family, my heart, my soul.

The night I found out, I had just got out of work. I cried nonstop the entire night and knew I needed something to heal me temporarily. I needed something….

So I came up with this recipe.

I call it “Rickey’s mourning fries.”

The act of chopping took my mind off him. Frying transformed a basic potato into edible goodness.

Carbs are a source of comfort and the potato isn’t so evil like people think. People go out and do so much worse to cope with loss like take drugs, drink, or take it out on others. In eating a potato, you may be ingesting extra carbs, but know that you just have to go outside and walk for an extra 30 minutes and walking can be meditative and healing so no harm no foul. Besides, eating a potato is not the end of the world, especially when you feel like you’ve lost the world a.k.a your best friend. 

This recipe includes a few potatoes, a little salt and a pepper, a little coconut oil. That’s it. Basic. Like Rickey. 

Ingredients:

Potatoes (2-3 large russet)

1 tbs coconut oil

sea salt

black pepper

Directions:

Chop the potatoes into wedges. Heat coconut oil in a large skillet. Toss potatoes in the pan and make sure they get coated in the coconut oil. Let it sit for a bit and then toss again, making sure the potatoes don’t stick to the pan too much. 

Cover potatoes and let the steam help them cook. Toss periodically until all sides of the potatoes have been browned. 

Place potatoes onto a plate and season with salt and pepper.

I like mine with a little veganaise because deep down I must be European. 

Enjoy the comfort of homemade fries and if you feel guilty for eating carbs, go out and walk for 35-40 minutes and use the time to meditate, pray, unite with the universe’s goodness. We may lose people we love but it’s only from this plane. Somewhere they are serving as angels. The abrupt departure only means they were urgently needed elsewhere. 

Ingesting a little carbs for comfort is grounding.  Avoiding emotions by taking pills is not. Gorging on food is not recommended either. This is about wading through our toughest moments, knowing that we will get through it, with a lot of love, a lot of forgiveness and understanding, and a little plate of fries. 

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Grandma’s Saltwater Flush

So yesterday morning my grandma woke me up like at 5am saying that she wanted to go to the emergency room because she was in pain from her leg cramps and she was constipated. She wanted me to go get her an enema from the drugstore and that’s when I told her I knew of something that would make her poop: the saltwater flush.

She was desperate, so she said she would try it. I had to admit I was nervous because she said she had pain in her pelvis. I started thinking that maybe it was something else, but I gave her the saltwater drink anyway and went to the drugstore to get an enema and stool softener, at the pharmacist’s suggestion.

When I returned, my grandma had drank the entire saltwater drink so I gave her a second one, just to be sure. About 30 minutes later, the magic happened and she began to poop. She even had an accident, but I could see the relief in her face. It worked and I felt good knowing that I could help her. She didn’t expect to be pooping so much though. She was like, “I’m still going.” I told her that she had basically given herself a natural colonoscopy and whatever was in her colon was coming out in a hot, hurried frenzy. Oh, the saltwater flush won’t let any of us down. I know it’s gross but if you are reading this, then you may know just how euphoric it feels after you experience the saltwater flush. Nobody should be denied this feeling and it’s totally free. All you need to have or buy is sea salt.

Hopefully my grandma will see that my natural methods are good and they work. I returned the enema and stool softener today because she didn’t need that stuff. Those damn pain pills she takes make her constipated. Doctors need to understand the serious effects many of these medications have on the patients who ingest them. These freaking pills make her tired, loopy, and constipated. This is the solution my grandma’s doctor has provided to deal with her terrible leg cramps. We as a society need to be more independent and learn natural healing because the pharmaceutical industry is just another business that doesn’t have the consumer’s best interest at heart. I’m glad I was here to help my grandma otherwise she would have gone to the emergency room.  I’m grateful I was able to help my grandma in her desperate time of need.

The throat and truth telling

I lay in bed at 2:30 in the morning with a nasty sore throat and cough. For days I had become progressively worse and I really didn’t know what to do. I had taken teas, gargled with warm salt water, guzzled apple cider vinegar, you name it.

So I was just sitting there (because laying down made it worse), couldn’t sleep, so I started doing research on the metaphysical reason why we get sick in the throat and I found that it’s due to the inability to express ourselves or speak our truth.

I had to face it. I hadn’t written anything in a while and recently quit my first/last casino job.

Having worked as a server before, I decided to take on the job and just give it a try. Things were going pretty well until they decided to put me on the graveyard shift working from 12am to 8:30am every day but I couldn’t do anything about it since they give the new people the worst shifts and I had to accept it. Even though I voiced my concern, that was part of the job. I have never been a night owl. I was always the girl who goes to bed at 10pm for a great majority of my life, except for a period of time when I dated a computer science nerd who went to bed frequently at 5am and slept all day.

So, the job was weird like that and I started to be faced with the reality that I really didn’t need to be doing a job like that because I had already been to school and could probably get a better job. I was surrounded by people who felt stuck in the job and accepted unusual working conditions and crap from people because they had bills to pay and kids to feed.

One of my coworkers looked at me one day and asked. So let me get this straight…”you’re single, Latina, 30, with no kids? That’s rare.”

Yea, I know it is. I was so out of my element while I worked there and I wasn’t writing at all because I was always so tired. Working in the casino really made me think about myself and what I was doing. I was educated with no children. I didn’t need to be there, but I was there, why? That’s what I really had to come to terms with.

As I lay there at 2:30 in the morning, I turned on the T.V. and a program came on about women comedians. One of the first things I ever wanted to be was a comedian because I loved to make people laugh.

At that moment, I realized I wasn’t living my truth. My body got sick in order to remind me to live my freaking truth. Not that I’m going to go out and be a comedienne, but I needed to express myself more than I was. Sometimes we don’t want to listen but the body will make you. Sometimes pills, cough syrup, even our alternative medicinal remedies aren’t going to heal us. It’s figuring out the real shit that’s going on in our hearts/minds/souls that we need to pinpoint, figure out, and deal with in order to heal.

And I literally had to create something in order to heal. I literally had to sit my ass down and start writing in order to feel better because I was finally telling my truth and unclogging my fifth chakra, where truth telling comes from.

So another lesson I learned from the metaphysical world. If you get sick in your throat, you need to say what you need to say. That’s it.

Focusing on what you want rather than what you don’t

It’s official. I am returning to Los Angeles in two weeks and I am determined to see this experience positively and focus on what I want rather than what I don’t.

I came to Phoenix last May with a head full of Louise Hay and Gabby Bernstein. I had affirmations programmed on my cell phone that went off sporadically throughout the day to keep me focused, positive, and in a good head space and that is exactly what I cultivated here.

I am extremely grateful to have found a wonderful Bikram studio full of amazing teachers that inspired me and pushed me to grow in my practice. I was ready for it and I met the challenge. I am extremely grateful to have found a job that was flexible and allowed me to make enough money to get me out of loan default!

I got out of loan default and landed a job back in L.A. within the same week. If that’s not destiny, I am not sure what is, which is why it’s made it easier for me to read the signs around me.

As doubtful as a Libra can sometimes be when making decisions, I feel that returning to Los Angeles at this time is the right decision. Yesterday I put the two-week notice in at my job and at the yoga studio.

Keeping a positive mind set and focusing on what I want rather than what I don’t want is essential. There was so much I wanted to move away from when I moved out of L.A., but now I will be returning, I have to keep the positive head space I cultivated in order to maintain my sanity and peace of mind rather than go back to that place I was in full of fear, doubt, and worry.

I’m basically moving back to L.A. to help my 80-something-ish grandmother that my recently deceased uncle used to care for.

I will embark on a new project that I will include in the blog, about assisting my grandmother through the use of natural, healthy food. I was a bit discouraged last time I visited because she told me a salad I made was “Too healthy,” and I thought to myself, dude, I’m moving in with you soon and this salad isn’t really even that healthy compared to the other things I make. My grandma is a strong antagonist, but every good story needs one and I care too much about her to back down. I have to give it a shot. Quality of life is my mission and it’s never too late for anyone, even an 80-year old woman hopped up on pain killers.

I will keep telling myself: this experience will be a good one. I am going to make the green shakes every morning and raw salads for lunch and do my best.

And regarding my yoga practice, well, I’m probably going to go back to the downtown L.A. studio, because it’s the closest to me and everyone knows me so it will be a smooth transition although I’ve been toying with the idea of trying a different yoga studio that’s not Bikram…

We’ll see. I just want to try new things, new studios. I was at Bikram downtown L.A. for three years and I just want to keep with the theme of trying new things.

I am keeping and cultivating a positive head space. Focusing on what we want is essential. You get whatever you focus on, negative or not. The mind is a muscle and will grow whatever it is you feed it. We are that powerful as human beings. It’s exciting to know that you can get whatever you want, but we have to keep our heads held high, full of the good stuff and good people.