Societal pressures can kiss my ass. There were so many people I came across in my late twenties who often looked at me like the freak that didn’t have any kids or wasn’t married but here’s what I have to say to that: I’m alive and happy, successful and perfectly fine just working on myself, getting mentally, spiritually, emotionally and economically prepared to have a kid. You know I’m a hopeless romantic and I’ve always wanted to marry someone I was madly in love with. I just hadn’t found the right partner in my twenties and I wasn’t going to just hook up with someone and marry them just because society kept pushing me to.
Now that I’m 30 I don’t feel pressure. It’s like a new day and I feel free. In ending my past relationship, it’s like I said F*** you to society. I’m not going to stay in a relationship and conform to standards that aren’t my own. I only live by love’s rules and if the love isn’t there, then it’s time to move on.
I have thought often about why people push so hard for others to settle down young. Think about that phrase: settle down. Settling down doesn’t just mean hanging up your heels and getting a normal job. It can mean much more, like settling for less than our wildest dreams and why would society push for that? Um….to control us better. People who are single or unmarried in your thirties with no kids are like a dangerous breed. We are free and nobody can stop us or tie us down. We can stay out as long as we want, spend money on ourselves, take random trips, reboot our careers any time, quit jobs, and just have time to think and dream without the sound of wailing children or dissatisfied spouses.
I have mad respect for my fellow friends who have children at my age, but I sure as hell don’t feel bad about my situation any longer.
Turning thirty is like the ticking time bomb that people use to scare you into mediocrity. Oh, I better do that before I’m 30, have kids, get married before I’m 30. It’s like, what do you think is going to happen to you when you turn 30? You’re going to expire? Disappear? Explode?
I’m telling you that I feel like something has exploded within me and it’s the feeling of freedom. No more societal pressure somehow. I’m 30 and I didn’t die because I didn’t have kids. I’m taking my time. I have faith that the universe has led me exactly where I’m supposed to be. If it happens, it happens. If it doesn’t, it doesn’t. I’m cool with that. Faith stands for :Finally, Allowing, It, To, Happen. That’s my motto these days.
If anyone ever tries to make you feel bad about not settling down in your twenties, that person is close-minded and doesn’t understand that there is more to life. There’s nothing wrong with any of us in any situation we are in. We are perfectly beautiful every day, in every moment.